Prepare Jr. for Adversity!
So, Jr. (my term for your BB player) wants to play college basketball. Many high school players share this dream and they all need to know that the path through collegiate athletics is littered with obstacles, challenges, and adversity. Players who know that the path will not always be rosy and who get good advice during difficult times tend to have the best chances for success.
My son, who is currently a student athlete at Arkansas Tech, prepared long and hard through physical and academic adversity to be ready to play BB during the 2008-09 seasin. One week before the beginning of the season, he came down the wrong way on a knee, and that was it. Surgery quickly followed and rehab is currently under way. How will he deal with this new challenge? Will he allow his academics to slip? Will he exert the effort and hard work necessary to rehab and fulfill his dream? What will he learn from this experience? Will this situation make him bitter or better?
One certainty for every college athlete is adversity! The coaches may ride Jr. very hard. Jr. may not get the playing time he expected. The school may change coaches in midstream. The school may recruit “Mr. Basketball” at Jr.’s position. An injury could occur. Academic issues may threaten Jr.’s eligibility. The team may not like Jr. and make things difficult for him. This list can go on and on.
Adversity MUST be viewed as opportunities to develop Jr.’s character. That nasty attitude may not be discovered until pressure is applied. Jr. may have never realized that his work ethic needs adjustment if he had not been benched. The opportunity to play college ball and get a great education may have never been appreciated until it was temporarily taken away. Parents, it IS YOUR JOB to help Jr. understand that the path to success goes straight through adversity!
The distress call
As a parent, how do you respond when Jr. calls pouting about a problem? During his freshman season, my son Mike, called me concerning a coach’s decision to make him run “Stadiums” (running up and down stadium steps). Mike felt that this was unfair because the coach misunderstood the circumstances that led to the “punishment”. How did I respond? Well, though I privately agreed that the coach was a bit unfair, I asked my son, “WHY are you calling ME? I am not your coach; you can run the “Stadiums” or quit the team. This is up to you!”. I then hung up the phone. Fortunately, Mike made the right decision. Not only did he run the stadiums, but his level of play improved, including a couple of double-doubles and a 16 point effort in 14 minutes to end the season. If I had patronized him, I would have destroyed an opportunity for my son to mature as a person and a player. I have a hard and fast policy when it comes to my son’s coaches, “I allow them to coach (without interference) and I parent, case closed!
This reminds me of a scene from the movie, “Remember the Titans”. Head football coach, Denzel Washington tells one of his assistant coaches who chooses to play a player that Denzel had benched, “You are not helping these kids by patronizing them, you are…crippling them for LIFE!”.
Coach Herb Sendek of Arizona State highlighted these truths during the 2008 RCS Sports’ Parent and Coaches Recruiting Workshop when he shared “The Vinny DelNegro Story”. I have published this clip on YouTube and you can view it by clicking below.
The Dad
My son, who is currently a student athlete at Arkansas Tech, prepared long and hard through physical and academic adversity to be ready to play BB during the 2008-09 seasin. One week before the beginning of the season, he came down the wrong way on a knee, and that was it. Surgery quickly followed and rehab is currently under way. How will he deal with this new challenge? Will he allow his academics to slip? Will he exert the effort and hard work necessary to rehab and fulfill his dream? What will he learn from this experience? Will this situation make him bitter or better?
One certainty for every college athlete is adversity! The coaches may ride Jr. very hard. Jr. may not get the playing time he expected. The school may change coaches in midstream. The school may recruit “Mr. Basketball” at Jr.’s position. An injury could occur. Academic issues may threaten Jr.’s eligibility. The team may not like Jr. and make things difficult for him. This list can go on and on.
Adversity MUST be viewed as opportunities to develop Jr.’s character. That nasty attitude may not be discovered until pressure is applied. Jr. may have never realized that his work ethic needs adjustment if he had not been benched. The opportunity to play college ball and get a great education may have never been appreciated until it was temporarily taken away. Parents, it IS YOUR JOB to help Jr. understand that the path to success goes straight through adversity!
The distress call
As a parent, how do you respond when Jr. calls pouting about a problem? During his freshman season, my son Mike, called me concerning a coach’s decision to make him run “Stadiums” (running up and down stadium steps). Mike felt that this was unfair because the coach misunderstood the circumstances that led to the “punishment”. How did I respond? Well, though I privately agreed that the coach was a bit unfair, I asked my son, “WHY are you calling ME? I am not your coach; you can run the “Stadiums” or quit the team. This is up to you!”. I then hung up the phone. Fortunately, Mike made the right decision. Not only did he run the stadiums, but his level of play improved, including a couple of double-doubles and a 16 point effort in 14 minutes to end the season. If I had patronized him, I would have destroyed an opportunity for my son to mature as a person and a player. I have a hard and fast policy when it comes to my son’s coaches, “I allow them to coach (without interference) and I parent, case closed!
This reminds me of a scene from the movie, “Remember the Titans”. Head football coach, Denzel Washington tells one of his assistant coaches who chooses to play a player that Denzel had benched, “You are not helping these kids by patronizing them, you are…crippling them for LIFE!”.
Coach Herb Sendek of Arizona State highlighted these truths during the 2008 RCS Sports’ Parent and Coaches Recruiting Workshop when he shared “The Vinny DelNegro Story”. I have published this clip on YouTube and you can view it by clicking below.
The Dad
View video on You Tube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5dcqpHJih2c
posted by Larry Shepard @ 11:33 AM
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